Find out more about Transgender Day of Remembrance at www.transgenderdor.org
See the list of people who died because of anti-transgender violence in 2012.
just because coming out is brave, doesn’t mean being in the closet is cowardly.
queer existence, queer survival is brave.
Including “Young adult novels with main and supporting characters who identify as Transgender” and “Young adult novels with Genderqueer characters or characters who express gender ambiguity”
This is a list I made for YALSA’s The Hub on the wide range of YA literature featuring LGBTQ characters. See the full post and a downloadable pdf here.
That’s right kiddies: It’s time for another intersectionality lecture compliments of lightspeedsound, resident asian bitch diva goddess.
So this is why I cringe and scream whenever a white queer person talks about how we don’t need to mention race, because “we’re all queer here.”
Like dude, plz stfu.
Here’s my thing:
When a white kid comes out, sure, there are unaccepting parents. There are also parents that are totally cool and cognizant. A white (cis) gay guy friend of mine told me that his mom cried when he came out to her. Not because she was homophobic and hated the gay or anything ,but because she was scared about the way the world was going to treat her son…a a GAY man.
Now, when I came out to my mom (who, I’m sure, told my dad. It’s pretty much a given in my immediate family that I’m totes queer), she reacted pretty much ideally. Sure, there was some awkward and uncomfortable explaining about pansexuality/bisexuality and how that worked and how “No, mom, that does not mean that I’m incapable of being in an exclusive relationship with a dude,” but it turned out really great. At the end of the conversation, after I started crying with frustration because mom didn’t get my sexuality, she started crying too. And she just hugged me and said, “All I want, and all papa wants, all we want as parents, is for you to find somebody that loves you as much as you love them. That cherishes you the way we do. That’s all a parent could ever wish for, for their kids.” Cue the heartwarming strings music.
Anyways, that was just step one. For white queer kids with accepting parents, it’s all about getting the world to see the kid beyond their respective queerness.
But when *I* was applying to law school, and writing a VERY queer-driven personal statement, my mom sat me down and had a really serious talk. And sure, it was about queerness, but it was also about being Asian.
My mom, by the way is pretty much an asian bitch diva goddess, just like me. She’s where I get it from. She raised me and my sister to give no fucks and to basically radiate awesomeness and class. My mother is a tiny asian woman doctor, who raised me and my sister in the South (with a capital “S,” it was that fucking conservative). She (and my dad) grew up during martial law in the Philippines. They earned their green card in inner city Detroit and then Wise FUCKING Virginia (which is as boonie town southern as it gets). My mother is literally a super hero.
So when she sat me down to talk to me about being an Asian woman in a white man’s profession, I listened close.
Basically, my mom told me that while she knew I was awesome and more than my Asian queerhood, the white people who would be guiding all the most important decisions wouldn’t. She told me that my last name alone pretty much guaranteed that I would be immediately judged as an Asian woman. That I would have to work ten times harder, be ten times more competent, be ten times more impressive and well-spoken and well-dressed just to be taken seriously, be viewed as more than a “diversity badge” for whomever I ended up working for. That I would be facing a hell of a lot of stereotypes about women, Asians, and submissive Asian women.
So, my mom explained, coming out in an application personal statement as QUEER TOO was shooting myself in the foot. I would be screwing myself over. ”That’s just the way the world works,” she said. The way to go, she advised, was to be hella impressive and accomplished, and THEN come out. In the long run, my credibility wouldn’t be questioned. And, as a successful queer, Asian woman, I would be doing more for the movement’s image. I could disprove bigotry and raise awareness from a position of power.
So don’t talk to me about how the queer rights movement doesn’t need any conversations about race thrown in. It’s impossible for me to fathom approaching issues of queerness without taking into account my race. There are layers and layers of experiences and considerations and for you, a white person, to tell me that I’m doing less for the movement because I’m “diverting” it is more than ignorance. It’s fucking erasure. It’s fucking stupidity. And it’s going to get some QPOC in downright fucking dangerous situations, you asshat. Stop thinking that the entire world of queerness is in a vacuum. it’s not.
I’m here and I’m queer.
And I’m Asian and trailblazin’
Deal with it.
In light of this week’s Supreme Court rulings, following is a summary of the laws on same-sex marriage in all 50 states, and a look at how the Supreme Court action might affect them
Know what really creeps me out?
How much homophobes are obsessed with gay sex.
Seriously, any sort of queer content, no matter how subtle, in mainstream media is met with straight people freaking out about how they’re meant to explain gay sex to their children.
Let’s take Paranorman for instance - parents lost their SHIT when the football player MENTIONED HIS BOYFRIEND. Freaked the fuck out on “HOW WILL I EXPLAIN HOMOSEXUAL SEX TO MY CHILD!?”
Why the fuck do they instantly jump to sexual content?
Like fuck, when the girl asked him on a date, no one stood up and screamed “HOW WILL I EXPLAIN HOW THIS GIRL WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH THIS FOOTBALL PLAYER, TO MY CHILD!?”
Why they gotta be all creepy and suddenly go: Queer subject - “OH, OH SEX, SEX, SEEEEX, OMG QUEER SEX. WOW.”
Or how any same sex kissing is INNAPROPRO, but straight people can passionately mac-the-fuck-out and no one bats and eyelash.
Homophobes think about queer sex more than queer people do.
Ya’ll have a problem.
I want queer people to be able to turn on the tv and see themselves.
i want them to be able to watch a shitty romantic comedy with an obvious plot and see themselves, to watch a serious tv show about vampire killing FBI agents and see themselves, to watch a fairytale kid’s movie and see themselves-
i want queer people to count as people outside of shitty, offensive dramas that see queerness as a gate to more drama, something all-defining and life-ruining, written by writers who don’t care enough to learn what’s a stereotype and what’s reality and still want cookies for putting goddamn cardboard cuttouts on their show-
and i want that queerness to be evident and unarguable.
i don’t want shitty backhanded references to a dude’s “friendliness” with his best friend-
i don’t want half-hearted mentions of a main character’s gay friend in an attempt to prove that the character and that the show aren’t homophobic-
I don’t want queerbaiting, that straight viewers can claim was just a joke, because it was, it’s just a joke the show can profit off for “representing” someone they don’t even fucking count as enough of a person to deserve to be treated with respect-
And i want queer ladies and queer dudes and genderqueer queers and i want them to be different races and classes and have different goals and opinions and lifestyles and fashion choices and interests and lives and challenges, because queer people are not one, shitty, poorly done stereotype
I want to count as a fucking person
i want every single queer person to count as a fucking person
a person whose story isn’t a joke, isn’t something to be ashamed of, isn’t something you see once in an afterschool special about not bullying people, until they get “turned straight” or “fixed” or “just hadn’t met the right person” or fucking kill themselves or turn out to be the villain if they “stay queer” because being queer means one has to be ‘punished’ for it-
I want us to fucking count, and i want the media to acknowledge we count.
If people are really going to assume that guys with long hair are gay and girls with short hair are lesbians then I am going to assume that all bald men are actually eagles.
Be a trans* ally & help fight transphobia & cissexism
1. Use the term ‘cisgender’ when referring to non-trans* individuals, rather than transphobic words like “normal,” which imply that trans* individuals are abnormal, weird, ill, or broken.
2. Do not use transphobic slurs, such as “tra-ny” or “shemale.” These words are intended to insult and harm trans* individuals.
3. Always use the name any individual gives you. Do not ask someone what their “real” name is. (Their desired name is their real name.)
4. Always use the desired pronouns of an individual. If you are unsure which pronoun to use, politely and privately ask the individual what their preferred pronouns are.
5. Do not claim someone’s gender identity as false, nonexistent, immoral, or a result of an illness or trauma.
6. Do not ask questions regarding someone’s anatomy, or question if they have transitioned or will be transitioning in the future.
7. Do not ask to see the photographs of a person before they transitioned. Likewise, do not ask invasive, personal questions of a person regarding their life before they transitioned.
8. Never out a trans* individual to others. Likewise, do not ask others if “so-and-so is transgender.”
9. Do not assume an individual’s sexual orientation due to their trans* identity.